Espinosa Footprints: Thank you very much, Mr. Roboto

Hello, August! My fast has broken. It took me a while to understand why I was compelled to take a month-long break from the computer. When someone would ask for the motive, I was often stumped at the beginning. I just knew it had to be done. Now that it's over, I understand myself a little better, and I have a clearer understanding of the way my computer affects my life.

Principle #1- I have a propensity to commit myself to seemingly innocuous short-term projects that balloon into colossal, all-consuming undertakings. Such as designing and hand-sewing two cow costumes on Chick-Fil-A's Cow Appreciation Day within three hours of our scheduled playdate there.

Consequently, I am also given to exhaustion, which I often relieve by...

Principle #2- retreating into mind. Prior to my fast, I realized that most nights after dinner, I would "check out" at the computer screen while Danny took care of the bedtime routine. I would only come in to check on an email or Google a location. But I'd get stuck reading newsfeeds... next thing I know Danny's washing dishes half-asleep and calling it a night. Worse off, half the time I never finished doing whatever task I'd initially set out to do. Sometimes I couldn't even remember the initial task. I realized quickly, though that the computer wasn't the problem, just an enabler. Without the computer I'd still find myself escaping... curled into the corner of the sofa, or developing curriculum for teaching cursive.... three years from now. I'm zoned out into another impulsive, mind-encompassing project.... How long has Dominic been standing there asking me for water? I don't know. I was immersed in writing a limerick utilizing only eight letters of the alphabet...

Principle #3- I suffer from an anxiety-inducing overload of information. Sensational news headlines across my inbox, even flashing in the advertising boxes on the perimeters of my email inbox. Doom, despair, and catastrophe in the oval office, in Congress, in the courtrooms. Supreme Court Justice Souter is quoted saying that the Founding Fathers did not know what they were talking about when they wrote the Constitution, nor did they understand it when they wrote it. My heart flutters in panic for the rest of the day. I can't do anything about Souter. And there's little I can do about the national debt or the extinction of the Florida panther. I think I really just need to work on meal planning for next week.

Having been out of the habit of escaping to the computer for projects and brain-breaks, and having been cleansed of any in-depth knowledge of the secret workings of our imploding government, I think I'm ready to re-enter the 21st century. I find myself with a little more time and energy these days, and less stress, so I've been able to hold out till after the kids are down to disengage from reality.

We celebrated the fourth of July at Hutchinson Island with my parents and the family of my mom's childhood friend, Mercy. Her grandson, Lucas, is a few months older than Noemie and really helped to warm Dominic and Noemie to the sand and surf. The three of them jumped the waves that lapped on shore, dug holes and made fortresses (not to be confused with girly castles).

We caught the fireworks from downtown Stuart, outside of Duffy's Sports Bar, where we were scarfing down our Mahi sandwiches as the first rockets went off. The soundtrack of our late-night drive home was my cousin Meli's birthday gift to me, Owl City's newest CD, which sounds like it should only be listened to when star-gazing or space travelling anyway. I can't imagine it any other way.

The second week of homeschooling was a bit of a train-wreck, but the kids still wanted to sit down in the playroom and do the routine songs every day. In fact, Dominic, who was speeding through his reading lessons in double time even got a third lesson in on a few occasions. As proud as I am of him, academic rigor really ranks at the bottom of the reasons I want to homeschool. She can tell you her continents but if you ask Noemie who the first President of the United States was, she'll answer "Santa." And that's ok. For now, anyway. The third week was much like the second. Sing a song that says to pray everyday, then we pray. We pray for protection for Danny, and we pray that the words of our mouths and the meditations of our hearts be acceptable in God's sight per Psalm 19, as my children's choir director, Mrs Congdon, taught us fifth graders to pray 15 years ago. Funny the things that stick with you. Then we sing a song that says what day of the week it is, and discuss the day's topic. Planets on week three may have been a little out of their range. I've gone ahead and tossed out next week's lessons on celestial navigation. Their favorite part is reading new books. They love that I hide them till the day we read them. I think I'll do that for a while on whatever topic they choose. I'm really an unschooler at heart- curriculum planning is for avifauna.

My friend Emily got me some educational goodies, including a number chart, for my birthday a few years ago. The parts where Toby can reach have been repeatedly torn to shreds and are held together with tape, stickers, and band-aids. Dominic, having mastered the chart, can count to 100. He also recently made the discovery that 96 and 69 both look the same rightside up as upside down.